FR: New salsa venue - keyword being "FREE"

[WhiteTiger]

Grand Opening - Free salsa event at Circa restaurant/lounge, and that is how I found myself in an overpopulated posh place on Tuesday.

Usually, salsa venues feel like talking to ppl in my own backyard. I've just been in those kind of places for so many times that it just works. However, this was a different situation since whoever decided on the location must have had some seriously good pot.

This place, Circa, is mainly a restaurant with music blasting through. No one really expects ppl dancing there, let alone salsa. So as I arrived the place was just too crowded to inhale even. But I figured that since it's (a) free and (b) still early I should stick around. If NOTHING ELSE, I'll work on getting comfortable in that venue in case I ever come back there (I have some VIP passes to that for whatever reason). After a while of just trying to pull my act together, I notice a mixed multi-set at the bottom level. I couldn't exactly make out the number of girls/guys since some are probably not part of the original group but just there b/c they are dancing with each other. Anyways I go down and open with something about how crowded the place is. Two of the girls start talking to me about that and I ask one of them if she actually can dance since she is standing out, she says not really so I decided to show her how it's done. Now I love dancing with beginners b/c from my experience many intermediate dancers are just stuck-up, but this girl was an exception. She was very nice and all, but she has no sense of beat so I really had to put a lot of effort to lead her so she feels as if she dances well, while still maintaining a convo and good eye contact.
She maintains good eye contact through the whole event and as we talk I find out she is from Russia so we do a bit of the convo in Russian (problem is I get a really good response from Russian/Ukranian girls when I show them I speak Russian, but my Russian sucks, any tips?).
I'm not exactly sure where the interaction is b/c she maintains eye contact no problem, but no real IOIs aside from that and I'm feeling very very very subtle pushaway as we dance super close (super close as in staggered knee-to-crutch almost). In retrospect I probably should have not rushed with the physical proximity so much so soon, it's possible to pull that off if one is super congruent with it, which I may not yet be but whatever.
The end of a few songs come in and I say I better go and say hi to my friends who actually invited me here (truth is they are not there but I thought I saw them from the other side of the place). She says goodbye quite easily, making me believe that there isn't that much hook going on at all.

I go over to the other side of the venue to find out the folks I mistook for my friends are just some randoms, so now what?
As I'm thinking that, I catch sight of a girl I'm positive I've seen before, call her HBPsych (for psychology, not psycho), I stop her walk by a slight touch on the outer arm and ask "hey, where do I know you from?"
in the several seconds she tries to think about that I realize that I have actually never met her before... LOL
Nevermind that, we start talking about some stuff dance related and as we are talking her friend joins in, I immediately take the initiative and introduce myself to her and fill her in, "we were just talking about...". A few more friends, guy friends this time, join in, I introduce around and we all chat. At some point HBPsych's friend asks HBPsych where she knows me from and I joke around about knowing each other for ages and ages. I reach out my fist so she can pound it, and her eyes open like this O_O when she sees my ring (Graduation ring with huge blue spinal in it). She takes interest in that so I take interest in that interaction. Note taken, use fist pound to peacock with grad ring.
Anyways, at some point HBPsych is talking to her guy friend about something I have no clue about, I stand there for a few seconds just hovering over and then decided that is bad bad bad DLV. So I put my hand on HBPsych back and stomach to shift her away so I can talk to her girl friend about something in the meantime.
After some time I have to go to the washroom, first for...natural business and also to try air out my head b/c the music is pounding like crazy (this seems to be a reoccurring theme here in vancouver venues). As I come back HBPsych is only there with one other friend, a guy friend, so I decide to make friends with him through her. We talk a bit and she introduced me, we all have a few laughs and the guy friend and I entertain each other with travel stories. I get quite a few IOIs from HBPsych b/c sometimes when the dude would tell something funny she would laugh and touch MY arm O_o.
I make sure to give back kino, but not too much, nothing too sexual since I believe this guy is after her as well and as long as I don't try and show off in front of him, he won't try and cockblock me, which would make logistics easier.
Also, she keeps teasing me about random things, which I take as IOIs and at some point she tries to guess my age, she overshoot royally but as I pretend to walk away insulted she grabs my hand and says "no no no, it's good because see I usually like older men." Through conversation I realize she is actually older than me (no idea by how much though at the time) so after something she teases me about I go "That's okay, I don't go for older women anyways "
We finally all take a seat in a vacant booth and take photos around. Also, it works well to my advantage the guy can't dance at all, well any latin dance anyways, so we are always in conversation except once in a while where *I* take HBPsych away for a dance.
The two order drinks and the dude pays, how sweet of him. Eventually HBPsych can't finish her glass of wine, the dude tries to get her to chug, and I cheer on, but she refuses finally asking me to chug. I go "okay" and the wine is instantly gone. They're both like "wow". I reply with a Borat accent, "I am Boris, I drink". They both crack up.
The night is coming to an end and I realize I spent the whole night with this one group of pretty fun people.
The guy suggest they go to a restaurant to get some food going (the kitchen here is already closed), she is hesitant but he offers to treat her. Either he is really into her (not out of the realm of possibility, she is hot), or he is just too loaded for his own good (also not out of the realm of possibility, he's apparently an actor).
I decide to retire home for two reasons, 1) I'm not that hungry (2) I don't want to just tail around or raise this guy's radar. If they are not dating by this point, nothing is gonna happen tonight guaranteed.
I get HBPsych's number and tell the guy I'll find him on facebook and HBPsych says, yeah I should add you as well.

Anyways, these past three days here is how the txt/phone game went.

The next day I send a txt her my number, and later that night (it's a wed night) I call her over, no pickup but leave a funny story voicemail msg

She txts me back going:
"Tell me story later? I'm watching a movie"

I text:
"Good movie? if it is I'm jumping on my jet and coming over"

Her:
"Oh ya? I'm sure a cab would be fine lol"

Later that night she txts me again:
"Wat's ur facebook name anyway? ActorDude took some adorable pics of us that nite lol"

I decide not to txt back that night to not seem eager. Wake up in the morning, she already found me on fb.

I txt her:
"Looks like u already found me, STALKER "

Her:
"That's me haha. Wat u gonna do about it :-P"

Me:
"Easy there, don't make me come over there little girl "

Her:
"Ooh I'm scared :-P"

So basically it seems to me that the girl is into me and I can score a day2 and/or more out of this. I was thinking calling her on Sat (which is probably today) and try and set up a day2 on either Sunday or Monday.

Feedback? Advice? Questions?

[eizmo]

Great pull mate!

What I usually do is just call the girl and say something like, "So you wont believe this new Thai restaurant I heard about downtown. The owner has imported all the spices and key ingredients from Thailand, even the staff and cooks are recently moved from Pataya. It's supposed to be one of the most authentic experiences around and no one even knows about it yet! I tell you what, let's go check it out on Monday after work. Here's the address, we can meet there for like 8.30pm."

So one or two things here:
1. Women are wayy more visual when it comes to their imagination. More so than men. When you're describing this place to her, you need to create an experience that she is going to enjoy. Now, there might not be a Thai restaurant necessarily. Maybe a new play, an improv class, a new exhibit at the art gallery. Whatever you like. I personally prefer going in for a dance class-like salsa or swing. The reason I say this is because I actually have a really good time at these things and it's a more fun experience than the dinner-date routine (unless there's something really unique about the restaurant. Maybe they have a singing chef?!)

2. Whenever you talk to this girl, just assume that she's coming with you. Like, don't ask her "would you be free on Monday night?" Just say that she should "join" you. You're including her as part of YOUR experience not the other way around-if that makes sense.

Hope that helped mate. Also, do not text her anymore. Call her in a few hours and just set up the day2. If you continue texting like this, it'll get boring very quickly for the both of you guys.

Sometimes, i just text the girl "call me, you wont believe what I just read online".

Take care and let us know how it goes,
Peace,
Eizmo

[dickerstein]

Nice work with the actor, it sounds like you let him take on the role of the 'guy in pursuit' while you stood back with her watching him dish out all of his material.

It sounds like the chemistry is good too, and that she trusts you. I'd take her out to do something completely ridiculous, maybe throw on sombraros, climb a tree and read her poetry while sucking back some wine.

Bring her into your world, whatever it is.