02-06-2012, 09:54 PM
I love the study of relationships. It seems no matter where you go people unanimously agree that relationships are the most important aspect of any individuals life.
We Are One.
I recently got back from another self - help seminar. In this seminar I became much more self aware. I experienced emotions I've never felt in my life. I lived in visualizations as real as my physical reality and I meditated to parts of my mind that I've never experienced in my life. The biggest thing that I realized was the power of relationships and the limitations that I had placed on myself for such a long time.
I believe that relationships are the most important aspect of any individuals life. I believe that an individual is the sum of their thoughts and their relationships in their life. I think that accountability is all on me when it comes down to my actions. I am the one who thinks the thoughts that cause my actions. However the relationships that I have in my life influence my thoughts which in turn influence my actions. I think that we are the sum of our thoughts plus our relationships.
In order for a connection to exist the communication pipeline has to be clear. No walls between each party. As soon as one person puts a block on communication the other person knows. Human intution is the greatest gift that we've been given. It's as if we can sense when another person is lying by the heavy feeling we get inside of our body. On the other hand it's as if we feel light as air when someone is being completely truthful with us.
Why Do We Hold Back?
We hold back because of insecurities. We hold back because of fears. We hold back because we've been hurt in the past when we let other people in. We hold back because we have trust issues. We hold back because we're afraid of the future based on what's happened in the past. The truth is we hold back because as human beings we have this innate tendency to always be right. The human mind is so focused on being right that sometimes it forgets the importance of compromise, of a healthy balanced relationship.
There comes a point where I had to ask myself: did I want to be right or did I want to have healthy relationships? I can't have both. Two people are completely different individuals based on their life experience and upbringings. For me to be "always right" is ignorant and self - righteous. My insecurities leaked into my brain about the relationships that I would have and because I always wanted to be right I wouldn't communicate these insecurities to the people that I loved the most. I didn't want them to see my weakness and I knew I was "right" about my insecure thoughts anyways.
I realized this weekend that I am not always right. In fact there are often times when my mind brings me the wrong thought. I allow this thought to trickle inside of my brain and don't communicate it to the relationships that mean the most to me and this leads to feelings of resentment. The human mind is amazing. The relationships that I had sensed the resentment that I had and because I wouldn't communicate the issue, the other party would start to feel resentment towards me too. Now we're two people resenting each other for one person's insecurity.
Talk About A Waste of Time.
We are one consciousness. We are one energy. We were not born and given these amazing gifts that human beings were given to hesitate. We were born and given these amazing gifts to communicate with each other and create something greater than ourselves. We were born to be open and honest with each other. This illusion of separation that we have in our society keeps us from communicating our thoughts and feelings with each other but the truth is that we are all one. We sense each other's feelings, we have an intution towards each other's thoughts.
I realized this weekend that my relationships deserve the best version of myself. We were born to communicate. How many times have you held back communication with someone you love because you wanted to be right? It doesn't take two people to make a relationship work. It takes one person, 100% committed to make a relationship work. We cannot change our relationships by telling the other person that they are wrong. We must change our relationships by inspiring ourselves to be right. We then liberate others around us to do the same just by being in their presence.
Do you want to be right or do you want to be loved?
We Are One.
I recently got back from another self - help seminar. In this seminar I became much more self aware. I experienced emotions I've never felt in my life. I lived in visualizations as real as my physical reality and I meditated to parts of my mind that I've never experienced in my life. The biggest thing that I realized was the power of relationships and the limitations that I had placed on myself for such a long time.
I believe that relationships are the most important aspect of any individuals life. I believe that an individual is the sum of their thoughts and their relationships in their life. I think that accountability is all on me when it comes down to my actions. I am the one who thinks the thoughts that cause my actions. However the relationships that I have in my life influence my thoughts which in turn influence my actions. I think that we are the sum of our thoughts plus our relationships.
In order for a connection to exist the communication pipeline has to be clear. No walls between each party. As soon as one person puts a block on communication the other person knows. Human intution is the greatest gift that we've been given. It's as if we can sense when another person is lying by the heavy feeling we get inside of our body. On the other hand it's as if we feel light as air when someone is being completely truthful with us.
Why Do We Hold Back?
We hold back because of insecurities. We hold back because of fears. We hold back because we've been hurt in the past when we let other people in. We hold back because we have trust issues. We hold back because we're afraid of the future based on what's happened in the past. The truth is we hold back because as human beings we have this innate tendency to always be right. The human mind is so focused on being right that sometimes it forgets the importance of compromise, of a healthy balanced relationship.
There comes a point where I had to ask myself: did I want to be right or did I want to have healthy relationships? I can't have both. Two people are completely different individuals based on their life experience and upbringings. For me to be "always right" is ignorant and self - righteous. My insecurities leaked into my brain about the relationships that I would have and because I always wanted to be right I wouldn't communicate these insecurities to the people that I loved the most. I didn't want them to see my weakness and I knew I was "right" about my insecure thoughts anyways.
I realized this weekend that I am not always right. In fact there are often times when my mind brings me the wrong thought. I allow this thought to trickle inside of my brain and don't communicate it to the relationships that mean the most to me and this leads to feelings of resentment. The human mind is amazing. The relationships that I had sensed the resentment that I had and because I wouldn't communicate the issue, the other party would start to feel resentment towards me too. Now we're two people resenting each other for one person's insecurity.
Talk About A Waste of Time.
We are one consciousness. We are one energy. We were not born and given these amazing gifts that human beings were given to hesitate. We were born and given these amazing gifts to communicate with each other and create something greater than ourselves. We were born to be open and honest with each other. This illusion of separation that we have in our society keeps us from communicating our thoughts and feelings with each other but the truth is that we are all one. We sense each other's feelings, we have an intution towards each other's thoughts.
I realized this weekend that my relationships deserve the best version of myself. We were born to communicate. How many times have you held back communication with someone you love because you wanted to be right? It doesn't take two people to make a relationship work. It takes one person, 100% committed to make a relationship work. We cannot change our relationships by telling the other person that they are wrong. We must change our relationships by inspiring ourselves to be right. We then liberate others around us to do the same just by being in their presence.
Do you want to be right or do you want to be loved?